My husband and I were jogging in the woods one day recently. (I use the term jogging loosely because I’m still recovering from an injury, and running and I aren’t getting along very well.) At one point, I made some comment. I don’t even remember what it was. He stopped, looked at me, and said, “You think a lot.” I said, “Well, yeah. There are probably a hundred different thoughts running through my head at any given moment. I mentally wrote five blog posts while we were running.” He responded, “You know what I’m thinking right now? I’m thinking I could use a sandwich.”
I don’t like to stereotype, but I really think this is a basic difference between men and women (maybe not ALL men and ALL women). Men can turn off their thoughts. Women cannot. Some women have learned the art. My mom is a certified meditation instructor. She often tells me I need to clear my thoughts. I’ve tried many of the meditation tricks. I can’t do it.
I’m sure this is why I have chronic insomnia problems. And I know many of my friends have it as well. What environment could be more conducive to swirling thoughts than a nice, quiet, dark room? Of course, the fact that I often wake up with night sweats does not help this problem at all. My husband can fall asleep in under two minutes. I’ve timed him. It sometimes takes me two hours to fall asleep at night (and another one or two when I wake up in the middle of the night).
I tend to have the television on a lot–usually on mindless sitcoms that don’t require my attention. Sometimes it’s not even loud enough for one to really pay attention. Why? Because it helps to drown out some of the thoughts. I can’t fathom what it’s like not to have thoughts constantly swirling through my head. I believe the older I get, the more thoughts are swirling.
The solution? Well, I’ll let you know when I figure it out. I can tell you some of my tricks. You can tell me yours.
Well, first of all, I take an over-the-counter sleeping pill every night. I did a sleep study. The doctor said my results showed nothing, but it was perfectly fine to take an over-the-counter medicine each night. It helps. I try to take it an hour before bed, but I usually remember right before bed. Another trick I use is sleep stories. There are some free apps out there that allow you to play sleep stories…boring stories told in a calming voice (I tend to like when men read the stories, but that’s just my personal preference). Even if I’m not paying attention to the stories, they slow my brain down. Fantasizing helps. I’m not necessarily talking about sexual fantasies (although those work too). Any fantasizing–it could be about your dream job, a conversation you wish you had had, or a spectacular vacation with your significant other. When you are focusing on the fantasy, you slow the thoughts in your head.
During the day, as I mentioned before, I sometimes have the television on mindless shows just as a distraction (it’s on right now). Music might work for you as well (I find the volume needs to be pretty low). I work from home in the afternoons, so I have more options than if I were in an office setting. Right now, I have a jigsaw puzzle set up in the front room. If I need a few minutes to clear my head, I will go work on it. Again, working from home has its advantages.
Sometimes, on a run, I just let the thoughts swirl. It’s a good time to ponder all the happenings in my head. If I need to shut them down (sometimes, when running, I can get a little too much into my head), I play music.
Do any of you relate to this? Does your brain work non-stop?